Monday, February 11, 2013

Professionally Single, Part 1

Noelle sighed as she sorted through her mail. She recognized another shower invitation. She opened it and was disappointed to find a wedding shower invitation. She preferred babies because there was no future commitment with them. New mothers didn't want bunches of people to come by, so no time for awkward questions. It was just friend time and a little bit of cuddling. Gaining a husband or a baby didn't matter when it came to the shower because they were all painful with numerous awkward questions about the lack of movement in her job or her life.

"I really wish she was having a baby." Noelle complained to her boxer dog, Chili. "I know I should be honored that I have so many friends who want to spend this special time with me, but after a while it feels like you are making fun of the single girl."

Chili's response was to to sigh while laying down on his bed.

"Thanks for caring so much." She continued complaining, "Couldn't I at least have some tragic break up story that explains my singleness? Well maybe that isn't the best idea, but it would make a better story."

As the words left her mouth, something in her brain clicked. A better story. "That's what I need." For the next few days, Noelle set about creating a better story. She knew she needed a new job title. She couldn't afford to quit her job, but she could at least have a new title or a part time job with a new title. Not just any new title, but something that made her singleness special, something that made it worthwhile.

"AH HA! I've got it." She exclaimed frightening Chili. "I will be professionally single" She sat down to write out a sample article to show her editor in the morning.

She approached her editor's office the next morning. "You have a degree in journalism. You have worked at this paper for 5 years. It is time for them to trust you with something new."

"Yes it is." She said straightening her posture and holding her head high. She entered her editors office to present her idea.

"Are you creating a new job for yourself?" He asked accusingly.

"Not at all sir. I am suggesting that I continue in my current job while adding a new column to the newspaper that will appeal to a new demographic. I have not seen anything like this amongst our competitors either. All of these benefits will come to the paper at no cost for the first 6 months. If at that time, the paper would like to cancel the column they can do so with no further requirements. However if the paper would like to continue the column, then I would be promoted to staff writer with the appropriate salary." Noelle calmly presented.

"So for the next 6 months, you continue to do your job as well as writing a column for the Lifestyle section. What if I don't like it after one month?"

"You are free to cancel it at that time."

"So what's the catch? Why are you working for free?"

"Honestly, I'm tired of the people in my life expecting me to have a life that follows everyone else's time table. I want them to respect my time table. Publishing articles about it will certainly shut some of them up. All I ask for are a few business cards to reflect the validity of the work I am doing."

"That would come out of your salary."

"It would be a small price to pay for gaining some respect."

"They can't say that you are a staff writer. So what would they say?"

"Noelle Rayburn. City Post. Professionally Single."



A Stopher said...

This seems like the start of something really good! Keep it coming!

Andrea Ward said...

Thanks. I'm getting close to having part 2 done. Maybe I'll get it up for tomorrow.